closed post: in the eye of the beholder

[tallyyoungblood]

Tally's had a lot on her mind since the death and the wedding. Life, love, the fragility of those things--but, of course, she is who she is, so her mind comes back to what it always does: beauty.

As much as she'd judged that strange man for his disheveled robes, everyone else had looked gorgeous, and happier than she'd ever seen a room full of pretties look. Most notably, they'd all looked legitimately different from each other, in just about every way possible. That the effect was beautiful instead of overwhelming is a new experience for Tally.

Tally feels like she knows what Claudius might say about the wedding. He'd heap effusive praise on everyone, and tell her that of course he wanted everyone to be uniquely themselves. She thinks he understands the halo effect better than anyone else she knows here, but also, as a former pre-Rusty king, understands how to deal with a crowd of adult uglies. Galahad, though, has never been someone Tally could guess at the thoughts of. He'd clearly been too happily overwhelmed to really talk at the ceremony itself, so she goes to knock on his door a few days later.

Comments

[tallyyoungblood]

Tally jumps up to look at herself in the mirror, temporarily forgetting about his question. It's not as neat as the picture in the Rusty magazine, but she still looks utterly transformed. The waves break up the Pretty Committee-approved lines of her face, and the orange reminds her of something poisonous.

"Wow, Galahad-wa," she breathes. "I look like someone else. I love it."

[onthewillowsthere]

His mouth tucks incrementally and his serious, unblinking gaze becomes a little softer. "I'm glad."

[tallyyoungblood]

Tally shoots him a smile, then keeps admiring herself. "Um, for the survey... maybe major historical events? That's totally too broad, but I feel like something like that is the only way."

[onthewillowsthere]

"To be certain they converge, or know if they don't." He nods. "If you will arrange my hair, I will do your makeup whenever you like."

[tallyyoungblood]

"Oh, of course!" Tally grins at him. "Together we're a complete team."

[onthewillowsthere]

It startles him that she's so quick to join them together, but in a pleasant way. "We are," he says softly, and flashes a quick, flicking smile at her.

[tallyyoungblood]

"If you keep growing it out, I can do more with it," she says. "I mean, I can do some stuff now, too, but length is possibility-making."

[onthewillowsthere]

Galahad hates the sensation of his hair when it grows long, but he thinks about Lan Wangji's long sleek hair, and about Claudius brushing his own , and resolves to try. "All right," he says. "Thank you."

[tallyyoungblood]

"Your hair clips today are pretty," she adds.

[onthewillowsthere]

"Thank you," a touch shy. "I'm trying to ornament myself."

[tallyyoungblood]

"Let me guess, also totally forbidden."

[onthewillowsthere]

A faint smile. "Yes."

[tallyyoungblood]

"It's funny that it's crim for you and encouraged for me," Tally says. "Like, not dressing up is a total rebellion at home."

[onthewillowsthere]

"Vanity is a sin. God directed me to wear plain clothes and no ornaments of any kind so I wouldn't be tempted by worldly pleasures." He tilts his head slightly. "The nuns lived that way too. I never saw anyone wear jewels until I came to Camelot."

[tallyyoungblood]

"That's so bogus. It's also just, like, not how human brains even work," Tally scoffs. "We can't help but want to be beautiful."

[onthewillowsthere]

"Is that true? It's natural?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"Yes. It's evolution. Um... do you know about that one at all?"

[onthewillowsthere]

"Yes. Claudius told me about Charles Darwin." He understands how the finches fit in now too.

[tallyyoungblood]

"Oh, good! Well, in order to pass on your genes, you want a healthy mate and to protect your children, right? So we automatically look for signs of health and youth in other people. That's where beauty comes from. I look like this because big eyes remind people of things they want to protect, like children and kittens and stuff, and the clear skin and the symmetry show I'm not sick and wasn't sick as a child. Obviously, like, we've gotten past the part of history where everyone has to have a million children, but we're still programmed by our genes to look for beauty. And of course we want to look beautiful, to attract other people."

[onthewillowsthere]

He's silent, turning this over. He does want Claudius to notice the way he clothes and decorates himself, and think him lovely, but he also wants to be beautiful for beauty's sake. He was to be beautiful for no purpose, like the bone from in his pocket.

Finally he asks, "Do you want to be unbeautiful for Gideon?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"Unbeautiful," Tally says. "You mean ugly?" She's turning the question over in her head.

[onthewillowsthere]

"Do you mean ugly in my world or yours?"

[tallyyoungblood]

"Ugly is ugly. It's evolution," Tally says stubbornly, but she frowns. Is it? She doesn't find Gideon ugly at all any more. "I don't want to be ugly, but maybe differently beautiful."

[onthewillowsthere]

"Like this," he says, meaning her face.

[tallyyoungblood]

"Yeah. Maybe being a little asymmetrical is bubbly sometimes."